While we all love interesting weed facts, we definitely love jokes too. Weed jokes never get old! In fact, when you’re high, chances are they get even funnier! You know some of these stoner jokes describe you perfectly. Read on and laugh with us!
Weed Joke 1: Stoner Truths
Q: How do you know you are a true stoner?
A: When your bong gets washed more than your dishes!
It’s even funnier when stoner jokes are so true. You know who you are and we see your stack of unwashed dishes! We’ve all been guilty of it, though, so no judgment.
Weed Joke 2: Flexible Stoners
Q: What do you call a pot smoker with two spliffs?
A: Double jointed!
We keep the weed jokes rolling in with this one! This one not only made us laugh but raised our fantasies. Who doesn’t want two spliffs in hand? Double-fisting at its finest. Yes, please!
Weed Joke 3: Stoner Food Jokes
Q: Why did the pothead plant cheerios?
A: He thought they were donut seeds!
Don’t we wish! If donut seeds were a thing, we would have fields of them just for ourselves! Clearly stoner jokes are total fantasies for everyone. Donuts are always excellent munchies, even if not the healthiest stoner snack!
Weed Joke 4: Smart Stoner Things
Q: How long does it take before a pound of bud goes bad?
A: I don’t know. I’ve never had it longer than an hour.
Even as marijuana jokes go, an hour would be some major smoking! Even the most experienced of us stoners would have a hard time making this one happen. Won’t stop some us from trying, though!
Weed Joke 5: Stoner Politics
Q: What is the difference between politicians and stoners?
A: Politicians don’t inhale…they just suck.
It’s awesome when marijuana jokes take you all the way back to 1992! This one had us rolling (like that pun? Oh yeah, we’re good like that). Weed jokes like this never get old and just get more relevant with age!
Weed Joke 6: Stoner Emergencies
A stoner called the fire department he said, “Come quick my house is on fire!”
The Fireman who responded asked, “How do we get there?”
The stoner says “DUH, in a big red truck!”
This one might be a stoner and a blonde! Classic but excellent, stoner jokes like this never go out of style and still make us laugh! Pop this into your arsenal of weed jokes and you’ll have everyone cracking up for sure!
Weed Joke 7: More Stoner Emergencies
Q: What did the stoner at the party say just before the cops showed up?
A: Let’s blow this joint!
A perfect example of waste not, want not! Do weed jokes get any more accurate? Chances are a lot of us have been here! Oh those college days…
Weed Joke 8: Stoners and Star Wars
Q: What do you call Harrison Ford when he smokes weed?
A: Han SoHigh!
One of our best high jokes! For real, toke it up and tell us you don’t laugh hysterically! We dare you.
Weed Joke 9: When Your Pet is High
It also doesn’t need an explanation! Not all jokes have to be traditional! One of our favorite high jokes. If you think the answer to this question is yes, you’re definitely stoned! Similar to the “High Occifer” style of jokes, this dog meme has circulated the internet for quite some time.
Weed Joke 10: We Need This Tree
Q: What do you call money that grows on trees?
Marijuana jokes for the win! We end on such a high note (LOVE these puns!).
Everyone loves jokes! When you’re high jokes are even funnier. So what happens when you get high and read jokes about getting high?
Check out GreenMed for all your weed needs and keep laughing it up! GreenMed – Cannabis Simplified!